PRAY

Where is truth , Who is right.
I am led so many ways you see
Who has helped you to fight your fight
Jesus says cry out to me.

He`s promised love without conditions
Promised miracles to see
Give him all your inhibitions
God the father , He or she.

A case in point is when you hurt
Jesus will console you
Look within , He is there to be
Your strength , Your love , he tells you.

In your dark and dreary days
Jesus shows you light
Let him speak do all he says
Always in his sight.

He is real and not a myth,
The best , A faithful friend
His love will bring an inner bliss
On him you can depend.

Miracles they do happen
So few think they can
Facing all your painful problems
Jesus is the man

I saw him Twice, He smiled  a lot
He killed the hurt, The pain
Appreciate what you have got
Just don`t forget his name.

Pray a lot and give your trust
He knows what to do
Never doubt , That`s a must
He makes your life so new .

GIGS

                                                           

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

CHEATIN

As I gazed into the blue
I spied a shape I thought was you
Rather plumptious, Hair receeding
From this distance, A man of breeding.

Was it you or did I blunder
Could it be your legs asunder
Kicking sand up , Hopefully not
In my rage I should have you shot.

Fetch and stay were sat beside you
Playing fetch with both your shoes
I wondered, Do men ever grow up
More to life than sex and a sup

You only went to the local spar
Caught with your pants down having a jar
Talk about catching you on the hop
What could have diverted you from the shop.

Was it her from number Two
She`d do any favour just for you
Caught you at, Think you`ve shat it
This is it the time to split

Barbara Dearer was her name
Owned a shoe shop, So she claimed
Satisfaction in the sand
When you come out you`ll feel my hand

I`m not bothered , Not no more
She`ll come to know , He`s just a bore
No more moods and no more rants
No more skiddy underpants

I wish them well, Time will tell
Is it bliss or is it hell
Iv`e hoped for this, For years of my life
Thank you dear Barbara for ending my strife

A BETTER WAY BY JIM BYRNE

I like to think i have worked,
Never on benefits,  Never shirked,
The lazy man is work shy,
He`s happy just getting by.

I love those zero hours contracts,
Work one day, The next get sacked,
Government talk is such a farce,
Country`s on the up my arse.

Forty years iv`e given the state,
Just the same for all my mates,
Mouths to feed , Bills to pay,
Working men should have more say.

No jobs from school to Sixty,
Lucky if you get to Fifty,
My father before me he went and died,
I`ll always remember , How hard he tried.

We`d nowt but didn`t go without,
M`a were up before cock shout,
Hear dad thrutchin ,Constipated,
Got much farther if only he had concentrated.

Knocker upper, Round by Six,
Hale or shine waving his stick,
Happy days we all had nowt,
Days when coppers gave you a clout.

Let`s hope the future is kind to our kids,
Have lives of plenty, Not on the skids,
Did no harm ,Played out all day,
Kids today know a better way.

ALL TALK JONNY BY JIM BYRNE

Where were you when all hell broke loose
Hiding behind the kitchen door
Were you so scared like a frightened goose
It were me that knocked him tut floor.

Where was the macho image that day
Left it to me to sort out
I keep all trouble and problems at bay
All you did was shout.

I`d hoped you might rise to the occasion
To kick my exes ass at the door
If you dont rise up John
I`ll knock you clean out on the floor

I found out you had a fling with big Gertrude
Big fat butt from Eight doors down
Gillian Hirp, Then ally Mamood
They both said you`re a clown.

TWO CATS BY JIM BYRNE

The purring of cats, A peaceful sound
Not when they fart and mess around
Sliding their backsides so deep on the ground
Two cats to look after at home.

At Three in the morning ,They just want to play
Ran across my head , Don`t care what i say
The vile smell of pooh,Is this here to stay
Two cats to look after at home

Kicking up litter , Up left and up right
Me in a daze, Not a nice sight
Does anyone out there know of this plight
Two cats to look after at home.

I`m told when they`re older they will settle down
They`ll get a sharp winger if they scratch at my crown
Not much hair left on top , Just a frown
Two cats to look after at home.

Cats unlike dogs never come when you call
At least with a dog you can play with it`s balls
Cats want to kill and attack , Is that all
Two cats to look after at home.

One of the cats, Bella her name
Looks at herself in the mirror. Insane
The other`s a lot fatter,Thinks it`s all just a game
Two cats to look after at home.

I`ll have a flat cap built into my door
Hoping i`ll see so much less and not more
They`ll always come back, Wanting some more
Two cats to look after at home.

A REET GOOD NEET

A pint or Three wont harm
Be sick ,Be drunk , Be jolly
No matter what, Be calm
This drinking lark is folly

I don`t know how I got home
Cold chips in hand to boot
must have enjoyed it though
I were sick all down me suit.

Condoms in my pocket
Don`t know how they got there
My eyes fell out their sockets
Had gravy in my hair.

I swore I wouldn`t do it
I`d got so I didn`t care
Reckless abandon in Godalming
Falling in  gutters. Just isn`t fair

Next time I take to drinkin
Shoot me when I`m drunk
Set me off a thinkin
And smellin like a skunk.

Climbing in the bed with her
Smellin all fragrant and washed
Smell of sick and stale old ale
Hopes of sex kiboshed

A funny night when I reflect
Would I ever drink again
What about my self respect
Of course I would my friend.