I`m roaming through Dingwall wanting a leak,
Willis my buddy at hand,
My friend willis the bus spotting geek,
Searched every inch of this land.
Travelled to Dingwall in a windowless bus,
Knee`s knockin, So taaters outside,
Three balaclavas, Minimum fuss,
Just want a warm place to hide.
Willis was teaching in Bolton one day,
Albert had got on his wick,
Crashing his head, Just wants to play,
Albert Sidebottom, What a big nit.
Get me a job at your place, Can you,
These bloody kids drive me mad,
No matter what I say or do,
They`re always fetchin their dad.
Some dad`s stick one on me,
I`m not a street fightin man,
I`ll get my own back, Just wait an see
Get me a job if you can.
Albert had head butted the glass in the door,
Got stuck, Willis was prizing him out,
It`s your fault sir, You pick on the poor,
Willis just gave him a clout.
Oo eck I`m bloomin fed up,
Teaching is drivin me mad,
Markin all night, Pains in my gut,
I dread the day, Bloomin sad.
I got him a job full time on the railway,
His stress it just disappeared,
He dropped dead and died after one or two days,
He`d just started growin a beard.
Life was a sod for willis for years,
He was happy doin his job,
He was my best pal I shed a few tears,
But big headed Albert, The slob.
On the buses in the sky,
PD2s and crossleys galore,
His life now one long high,
Listen Willis , See you some more.
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